Hot take: I think group trips where everyone pays the same are unfair for budgeters

Last month, my friends planned a weekend getaway and insisted on splitting all costs evenly. I was trying to save money, so I skipped some activities and ate cheap meals. When we settled up, I had to pay for things I didn't even do, which felt really wrong. I told them I'd only cover my share, and it got quiet for a minute. But standing my ground meant I stayed on track with my savings goal. Now I push for clear spending rules before any group event. What do you do when friends don't get your budget limits?

3 comments

3 Comments

gray1171mo ago

Yeah, that part about it helping people who order the expensive stuff is so true. I read a whole thread once where someone called that "luxury subsidizing," where the big spenders get a discount because everyone else chips in. Good on you for pushing for clear rules. It's like what @the_barbara said, they get over it fast when they see their own tab. I'd just be straight up next time and say you're on a tight plan, so you'll only be paying for your own meals and whatever activities you join. If they're real friends, they'll get it after the first awkward moment.

diana3141mo ago

Did your friends act different around you after you paid only for your stuff, or did things go back to normal? I never get why splitting everything down the middle is the automatic rule, it just helps people who order the expensive stuff. Maybe they truly don't get how tight things can be when you're watching every dollar.

the_barbara1mo ago

God, right? @diana314 The looks you get are priceless, like you just kicked a puppy. Things go back to normal once they realize they can't afford their own fancy drinks without your cash.