That time my sister-in-law told me my 'boundaries' sounded like a grocery list

I was trying to explain why I needed her to give me a week's notice before dropping off her kids for a playdate, and she just laughed and said, 'You know, you sound like you're reading from a coupon flyer, not setting a boundary.' It happened right in her kitchen while she was pouring coffee, and now every time I prep for a tough talk I check myself for sounding like I'm at the store. Anyone else have someone totally derail your point with a weird comparison?

2 comments

2 Comments

taylorb9413d ago

Honestly, that doesn't sound that bad to me. She was probably just joking around, not trying to derail anything.

jessica_dixon13d ago

Wait a second, I gotta push back a bit here. @taylorb94 I get what you're saying but this sounds like more than just a joke to me. People use humor to get out of being held accountable all the time, and her grocery list comment was a way to make his boundary feel petty and unreasonable when it's actually pretty normal. A week's notice isn't some crazy demand, it's basic common courtesy with kids. If she really meant it as just a joke she would have circled back and said something like "ok ok I get it, I'll try to give you more notice" but she didn't. She shut down the whole conversation by making him question himself, and now he's second guessing every serious talk he has. That's the part that makes it feel intentional to me, not just lighthearted teasing.