Pro tip: I finally got my uncle to admit he was wrong about the family cabin foundation

3 years ago my uncle insisted on pouring a concrete slab for the cabin in Vermont without any rebar. I argued with him for weeks, showed him articles, nothing worked. Last week I just asked him one simple question while we were both looking at a crack that formed - 'If you had to do it again, same time frame, same budget, would you still skip the rebar?' He paused for a solid 10 seconds then said 'probably not.' Small victory but felt huge. Has anyone else found a way to get stubborn family members to admit mistakes without them getting defensive?

2 comments

2 Comments

jason7521d ago

My buddy Tim does this with his dad about car maintenance. His old man never wants to admit he used the wrong oil weight in their truck. Tim just asks him 'if you were doing it for a neighbor, would you still grab the 10W-30?' Nine times out of ten his dad pauses and changes his tune. It's like asking someone to judge themselves from the outside instead of backing them into a corner.

noah4151d ago

Honestly I used to be the type who'd just keep hammering away at someone until they admitted they were wrong. Thought that was the only way to get through to people. But reading this made me realize I was just making them dig their heels in deeper. That question you asked your uncle is genius because it takes the ego out of it and makes it about the situation instead. I'm gonna try that with my brother next time he insists his way of loading the dishwasher is the only correct way.