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That 'just be yourself' advice my aunt gave me backfired hard

My Aunt Carol kept telling me to just be myself when meeting new people. I took that literally and showed up to a board game night after work completely exhausted and grumpy. I barely talked, sat in the corner, and left after 45 minutes because I was tired. Nobody invited me back to the next one, and my friend said I came off as rude and uninterested. Turns out, acting like a normal sociable person even when you're tired is the actual trick. Has anyone else found that raw honesty kills a new friendship faster than faking a little bit of energy?
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2 Comments
richardh44
Notice that "just be yourself" advice always assumes your default self is social and fun. Most people's default is tired, grumpy, or awkward. The real trick is knowing when to turn up the volume on your personality and when it's okay to be quiet. That whole advice is really just about not putting on a fake persona, not about showing every raw mood you have.
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carr.blake
Just be yourself" assumes you know who that is yet lol
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